So here I am watching Monday Night Football, it’s the Minnesota Vikings against the Chicago Bears. I really am not into the game. I am just watching it because it is the only clean thing on.
To me the thing I am taking from this game is what a man named Jay Cutler is doing. I mean this game he is doing great, but overall for the season he has stunk it up. He has thrown an NFL leading 25 interceptions. He has struggled to lead his team to win. Until a few minutes ago, Chicago had 22 possessions without scoring a touchdown. That means they can move the ball but they can’t get into the endzone. And I think you could blame Cutler for most of that. Wondering why I’m making such a big deal out of this?
Let’s rewind back to the months of July and August. Jay Cutler was a Bronco. Wait a what? Yeah, he played for the Denver Broncos. He was their franchise quarterback. Denver hired a young new coach named Josh McDaniels. Cutler wasn’t to happy about a few things there, threw a fit, and got his little butt traded. McDaniels thoughts, “You don’t want to be here, get out!”
To me this is huge. Finally a coach who doesn’t bend over backwards for his superstar player. That is what I am talking about. He whined and moaned his way out of Denver, and now is sucking it up in Chicago. Now while the Broncos are kind of in the playoff picture, the Bears are far from it, and Cutler didn’t do too much to prove he was to be worshipped and McDaniels should have bent over backwards to keep him.
Hey, I know that you have issues with people and that you need to work them out. I know that coaches can and should help players to get on the same page, catch the big picture and motivate them to be better people. But there comes a point when one must say, man up! Grow up and move on. Get with the program or get out!
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Rule #3 - Expectations
I propose we support a one month limit on going steady
I think It will keep people more able to deal with weird situations
And get to know more people
I think if you're ready to go out with Johnny
Now's the time to tell him about your one month limit
He wont mind he'll appreciate your fresh look on dating
And once you've dated someone else you can date him again
I'm sure he'll like it
Everyone will appreciate it
You're so novel what a good idea
You can keep your time to your self
You don't need date insurance
You can go out with whoever you want to
Every boy, every boy, in the whole world could be yours
If you'll just listen to my plan
THE TEENAGE GUIDE TO POPULARITY
Rule #3 - Expectations. Okay, before I get started into this whole thing, let me just make a statement. By no means am I saying that I am perfect at all dating advice and relationships. This is merely my opinion and my thoughts. I have made some of these mistakes myself. With that being said, let’s talk about expectations.
This is where I think most problems in dating come from. For some reason there is a breakdown with what one expects and hopes to come from each relationship. We never seem to make that clear, and sometimes, we throw in mixed signals. Let us begin with a quote from a rather wise man.
“If we start right, it is easy to go right all the time; but if we start wrong we may go wrong, and it will be a hard matter to get right.” - Joseph Smith
This is one of my favorite quotes in the world, because it is really the truth. If you look at anything, dating included, if you start right, it all works out. Whether it be a game, a job, school, whatever. The beginning is very important. Why is it so important in dating? Rather simple.
Let’s say a guy meets a girl, flirts with her, gets her number, and then never calls, what happens? The girl might be slightly crushed. Let’s take it farther. The guy takes her on a date, kisses her goodnight (big or small) and then never calls her, what happens? Super crushed and hates guys. If the guy never had any intention of taking the girl on a second date, or really even that, if he just wanted to make out with her, he should have made that very clear from the get go. Because, while some girls might just be looking for that, not all of them are. And it is usually the innocent ones that become the victims.
Now, let us say that a couple meet, go on a few dates, things go well, and they start dating. Well, why one might be thinking, I like dating them, but I have no intention of marrying them, the other might be praying and hoping that this is the one, so to speak. What happens? Well, the one is crush when a few months down the road the other says, it’s not you, it’s me, I’m just not ready, no need to hold you back.
So, think about it. What are you expecting from relationships? What are you hoping to gain? Marriage? A few nice months of courtship? NCMO? What? What do you want? And be completely clear about that, even if that means saying it out loud. And don’t just think what you want in general, every time you meet someone, think about what do you hope comes from that relationship? A co-worker you can talk to? A friend? Someone to study with? I am sure you aren’t sure what you want with each relationship, friendship or more. However, you can set some guidelines, like, I want to be friends with people first, and if things go well, then pursue a deeper relationship. You can tell when people are crushing on you, and you aren’t thinking so highly about them. Well, let them know. Don’t lead them on. Stop it before it gets to far gone, and out of control.
Are you worried about hurting someone? Well, if you think you will hurt them now, well, wait it out for a few more months, or years. Then see how they feel.
I know that this requires something out of each of us that we aren’t all to sure about. What do we want with our lives? What do we want in a spouse? Well, think about it, and then date with real intent. If you love a certain sport, or game, or have a hobby that makes you you, and you meet someone who doesn’t think the same. Don’t pursue it and say, oh they will change, or that isn’t a big deal. Set goals, and make your expectations clear.
Now, to review the three rules of dating:
Rule #1 - Breaking up - don’t put it off if it needs to be done.
Rule #2 - Likes attract likes - become who you want to date.
Rule #3 - Expectations- make them clear.
As stated above, I am no expert, and make no claim to be. These are just some of my thoughts on a very wide and very sensitive subject. I hope all of you can see and understand what I am trying to say and not be offended by my remarks. In case I don’t see you again, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
I think It will keep people more able to deal with weird situations
And get to know more people
I think if you're ready to go out with Johnny
Now's the time to tell him about your one month limit
He wont mind he'll appreciate your fresh look on dating
And once you've dated someone else you can date him again
I'm sure he'll like it
Everyone will appreciate it
You're so novel what a good idea
You can keep your time to your self
You don't need date insurance
You can go out with whoever you want to
Every boy, every boy, in the whole world could be yours
If you'll just listen to my plan
THE TEENAGE GUIDE TO POPULARITY
Rule #3 - Expectations. Okay, before I get started into this whole thing, let me just make a statement. By no means am I saying that I am perfect at all dating advice and relationships. This is merely my opinion and my thoughts. I have made some of these mistakes myself. With that being said, let’s talk about expectations.
This is where I think most problems in dating come from. For some reason there is a breakdown with what one expects and hopes to come from each relationship. We never seem to make that clear, and sometimes, we throw in mixed signals. Let us begin with a quote from a rather wise man.
“If we start right, it is easy to go right all the time; but if we start wrong we may go wrong, and it will be a hard matter to get right.” - Joseph Smith
This is one of my favorite quotes in the world, because it is really the truth. If you look at anything, dating included, if you start right, it all works out. Whether it be a game, a job, school, whatever. The beginning is very important. Why is it so important in dating? Rather simple.
Let’s say a guy meets a girl, flirts with her, gets her number, and then never calls, what happens? The girl might be slightly crushed. Let’s take it farther. The guy takes her on a date, kisses her goodnight (big or small) and then never calls her, what happens? Super crushed and hates guys. If the guy never had any intention of taking the girl on a second date, or really even that, if he just wanted to make out with her, he should have made that very clear from the get go. Because, while some girls might just be looking for that, not all of them are. And it is usually the innocent ones that become the victims.
Now, let us say that a couple meet, go on a few dates, things go well, and they start dating. Well, why one might be thinking, I like dating them, but I have no intention of marrying them, the other might be praying and hoping that this is the one, so to speak. What happens? Well, the one is crush when a few months down the road the other says, it’s not you, it’s me, I’m just not ready, no need to hold you back.
So, think about it. What are you expecting from relationships? What are you hoping to gain? Marriage? A few nice months of courtship? NCMO? What? What do you want? And be completely clear about that, even if that means saying it out loud. And don’t just think what you want in general, every time you meet someone, think about what do you hope comes from that relationship? A co-worker you can talk to? A friend? Someone to study with? I am sure you aren’t sure what you want with each relationship, friendship or more. However, you can set some guidelines, like, I want to be friends with people first, and if things go well, then pursue a deeper relationship. You can tell when people are crushing on you, and you aren’t thinking so highly about them. Well, let them know. Don’t lead them on. Stop it before it gets to far gone, and out of control.
Are you worried about hurting someone? Well, if you think you will hurt them now, well, wait it out for a few more months, or years. Then see how they feel.
I know that this requires something out of each of us that we aren’t all to sure about. What do we want with our lives? What do we want in a spouse? Well, think about it, and then date with real intent. If you love a certain sport, or game, or have a hobby that makes you you, and you meet someone who doesn’t think the same. Don’t pursue it and say, oh they will change, or that isn’t a big deal. Set goals, and make your expectations clear.
Now, to review the three rules of dating:
Rule #1 - Breaking up - don’t put it off if it needs to be done.
Rule #2 - Likes attract likes - become who you want to date.
Rule #3 - Expectations- make them clear.
As stated above, I am no expert, and make no claim to be. These are just some of my thoughts on a very wide and very sensitive subject. I hope all of you can see and understand what I am trying to say and not be offended by my remarks. In case I don’t see you again, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Rule #2 - Likes attract likes
Being attractive is the most important thing there is
If you wanna catch the biggest fish in your pond
You have to be as attractive as possible
Make sure to keep your hair spotless and clean
Wash it at least every two weeks
Once every two weeks
And if you see Johnny football hero in the hall
Tell him he played a great game
Tell him you like his article in the newspaper
Rule #2 - You might be wondering what it is. But it is rather simple. Likes attract likes. So, if you want to date some one attractive, you have to be attractive. If you want to date someone smart, you have to be smart. Want to date some religious, you have to be religious. Why? Well, if you aren’t then things won’t work. If you are one who likes to get up and go and do it, and you date someone who isn’t to worried about it, there are going to be some arguments. And so it is with any other thing. You like sports, and they hate them, problems.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying if you don’t agree on everything, you shouldn’t date or marry them. What I am saying is that you have to examine character traits. Like if someone seeks others approval in the little things, they aren’t going to change in the big decisions. So, if that bugs you a lot, well, they aren’t going to change for the big decisions. If some one is late for the day to day things, they will be late for almost everything. Indecisive about what they are going to eat.... you think they are going to be any different for a house or a car they are going to buy? So look at the character traits they have, do they match yours? If not, move on, or you better start making some changes.
Which brings me to my next point. You might think, well, I am not smart but I want to date/marry someone that is. Or I am not that religious, but I want to date/marry someone that is. What to do? Obviously we all have our lists of things we look forward in a future spouse. Let’s look into some sound solid counsel here.
“Young single adults ask me ‘What are the characteristics I should look for in a future spouse?’ As though they have some checklist of I need to find someone who has these three or four or five things. And I rather forcefully say to them you are so arrogant to think that you are some catch and that you want someone else who has these five things for you . If you found somebody who had that has these three or four or five characteristics that you are looking for, what makes you think they would want to marry you? The list is not for evaluating someone else. The list is for you, for me and what I or you need to become. And so if there are three primary characteristics that I hope to find in an eternal companion then those are the three things I ought to be working to become. Then it will be attractive to someone who has those things. My advice is your not on a shopping spree looking for the greatest value of this series of characteristics. You become what you hope your spouse will be and you’ll have a greater likely hood of finding that person.” - Elder David A. Bednar
So, if you want to catch the biggest fish in the pond, you have to be that fish. But realize, what is important to you. I know people who don’t care about religion, so, just because a lot of people see that as important, doesn’t mean they need to change themselves and become that. Make your list of what fish you want to catch, and you better become that. You’re not on some shopping spree, you can’t have the greatest most wonderful person and be a scrub. You better step your game up and become your best self, and you’ll find the best person for you.
If you wanna catch the biggest fish in your pond
You have to be as attractive as possible
Make sure to keep your hair spotless and clean
Wash it at least every two weeks
Once every two weeks
And if you see Johnny football hero in the hall
Tell him he played a great game
Tell him you like his article in the newspaper
Rule #2 - You might be wondering what it is. But it is rather simple. Likes attract likes. So, if you want to date some one attractive, you have to be attractive. If you want to date someone smart, you have to be smart. Want to date some religious, you have to be religious. Why? Well, if you aren’t then things won’t work. If you are one who likes to get up and go and do it, and you date someone who isn’t to worried about it, there are going to be some arguments. And so it is with any other thing. You like sports, and they hate them, problems.
Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying if you don’t agree on everything, you shouldn’t date or marry them. What I am saying is that you have to examine character traits. Like if someone seeks others approval in the little things, they aren’t going to change in the big decisions. So, if that bugs you a lot, well, they aren’t going to change for the big decisions. If some one is late for the day to day things, they will be late for almost everything. Indecisive about what they are going to eat.... you think they are going to be any different for a house or a car they are going to buy? So look at the character traits they have, do they match yours? If not, move on, or you better start making some changes.
Which brings me to my next point. You might think, well, I am not smart but I want to date/marry someone that is. Or I am not that religious, but I want to date/marry someone that is. What to do? Obviously we all have our lists of things we look forward in a future spouse. Let’s look into some sound solid counsel here.
“Young single adults ask me ‘What are the characteristics I should look for in a future spouse?’ As though they have some checklist of I need to find someone who has these three or four or five things. And I rather forcefully say to them you are so arrogant to think that you are some catch and that you want someone else who has these five things for you . If you found somebody who had that has these three or four or five characteristics that you are looking for, what makes you think they would want to marry you? The list is not for evaluating someone else. The list is for you, for me and what I or you need to become. And so if there are three primary characteristics that I hope to find in an eternal companion then those are the three things I ought to be working to become. Then it will be attractive to someone who has those things. My advice is your not on a shopping spree looking for the greatest value of this series of characteristics. You become what you hope your spouse will be and you’ll have a greater likely hood of finding that person.” - Elder David A. Bednar
So, if you want to catch the biggest fish in the pond, you have to be that fish. But realize, what is important to you. I know people who don’t care about religion, so, just because a lot of people see that as important, doesn’t mean they need to change themselves and become that. Make your list of what fish you want to catch, and you better become that. You’re not on some shopping spree, you can’t have the greatest most wonderful person and be a scrub. You better step your game up and become your best self, and you’ll find the best person for you.
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